The first day of programming on the Big Ten Network has just been announced …
- 11 am: The symbolic launch time was going to be 10 am, but like the misnamed league itself, it starts at 11.
- 11 am to 11:01 am: Great Ohio State Performances vs. the SEC
- 11:01 am to 11:05 am: Ads for the Big Ten Network
- 11:05 am to 11:30 am: Dr. Phil: Helping Michigan State cope with living in Michigan’s shadow
- 11:30 am to 12:30 pm: The Jim Tressel Variety Hour. Along with his always edgy monologue, watch as the Buckeye coach performs magic, does a little soft-shoe, and joins Sanjaya to bring down the house with a rendition of “Besame Mucho.”
- 12:30 to 12:31: Great Moments in Non-Revenue Sports History
- 12:31 to 12:40: Ads for the Big Ten Network
- 12:40 to 12:42: Michigan Running Backs and the NFL
- 12:42 to 1: Ads for the Big Ten Network
- 1 to 2: Flavor of Zook
- 2 to 3: The BTN True Hollywood Story: Iowa and the 1986 Rose Bowl
- 3 to 4: The Joe Paterno Party Machine. The legendary head coach welcomes Common, Hot Dollar, and Maroon 5
- 4 to 5: Pat Fitzgerald is 35 … and Coaching
- 5 to 6: Battle of the Mediocre Former Head Coaches. Watch as John Gutekunst, John Mackovic, Jim Colletto, Bobby Williams and Don Morton compete in media relations, film study, booster kissing and maintaining institutional control.
- 6 to 7: What Not To Wear: Stacy and Clinton raid Joe Tiller’s wardrobe and subject him to the 360-degree mirror in an attempt to makeover the Purdue head coach
- 7 to 7:30: Ads for the Big Ten Network
- 7:30 to 8: Top Chef: Trying to recreate the Wisconsin experience with brats, La Bamba burritos and Parthenon gyros
- 8 pm to 11 am: A loop of the Total Gym infomercial, hosted by Chuck Norris and Christie Brinkley
Some other top shows that missed the cut or are on hiatus until the end of football season are:
11:00-11:02 Highlights of Indiana football
Mr. Magoo starring Joe Paterno
Deal or No Deal with Ron Zook
Who Wants to be a Millionaire with Jim Tressel
Guess What's in Joe Tiller's Mouth
Dance Fever with Cheif Illiniwek
True Hollywood Story: John Goss & the 2005 season
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy: Jim Tressel offers sweater vests to all of the straight guys
The Real World: West Lafayette
Are You Smarter than an Ohio State Football Player?
Cheaters with host Jim Tressel
So You Think You can Dance? starring the U-M basketball team
The Price is Right with host Ed Martin
COPS: The Clarett Years
Open Mic with Brent Petway
Hooked on Phonics infomercial starring Andy Katzenmoyer
Media Relations for Dummies starring John L. Smith
Are You Smarter than a Michigan Athlete with a General Studies Major?
The Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest with the Wisconsin cheerleading team
Burn Notice: special remote location on MSU's campus
Cribs: The Ohio State Top Recruits Edition
The Man Show: with host Penn State alumnus John Amaechi
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